Time Required
This practice takes about 10 minutes. It can be done when your children are seeking another person’s forgiveness, and it can also be done before such a situation arises.
How to Do It
Like adults, children can find themselves in situations where they recognize they’ve hurt or wronged someone either on purpose or by accident. Although you might be tempted to ask your child to say they're sorry, not all apologies are effective. A more helpful approach is to invite your child to think about how to make amends.
Begin a conversation—either about something that happened to your child, or about a story your child is reading or watching where one character harmed another, regardless of their intention. Open by helping them to notice how the victim could be feeling and then asking, “What do you think you (or the character) could do to help right now?”
Encourage them to move beyond a perfunctory and half-hearted “Sorry” to think about possible actions they could take to alleviate the hurt or right the wrong. This could be helping someone rebuild a tower of cards that they knocked over, bringing an ice pack to someone who tripped over their foot, replacing someone’s markers that they let dry out, or asking someone they left out of a game to play with them.
Encourage your children to commit to an act of reparation alongside their apologies.
Why You Should Try It
Apologies alone can work to repair relationships by rebuilding trust. But when kids offer restitution to someone they wronged, they are also taking steps to ease that person's hurt feelings. As children get older, they begin to see coerced apologies (when, for example, a parent tells another child to apologize to them) as inauthentic. As a result, offering reparations is not only kinder but also more likely to be well-received.
Parents can help children understand the power of making amends in fostering forgiveness and stronger social ties. Because conflict will inevitably arise with others, making amends is a valuable relationship skill.
Why It Works
Not all apologies are created equal; the most effective ones include reparations in order to alleviate the hurt that we caused. Reparations help communicate remorse, and, as children get older, they are more forgiving of others who show remorse while apologizing. Reparations also help create new positive interactions between the individuals involved and can help them return to a cooperative relationship.
Evidence That It Works
Drell, M. B., & Jaswal, V. K. (2016). Making amends: Children’s expectations about and responses to apologies. Social Development, 25, 742–758.
Children who were six and seven years old built towers, which were knocked down by a college student who was playing alongside them. The children received one of four responses: a spontaneous apology, an apology after prompting, no apology, or an offer of restitution. While apologies or restitution led children to share more with the student compared to no apology, an offer of restitution was the only response that actually made kids feel better.
Sources
Vikram K. Jaswal, Ph.D., University of Virginia
Comments
and Reviews
Keyshia cole
I'm thrilled to share my positive experience with Data Forensics Cyber Services, who successfully helped me recover my digital currency from scammers. If you're a victim of cryptocurrency scams, I highly recommend reaching out to Data Forensics Recovery Cyber Services. Their expertise and assistance can be invaluable in recovering your lost assets. Let's spread awareness about these scams and support those affected. Kudos to Data Forensics Recovery Cyber Services for their exceptional work!" you can reach them via Email:DataForensicscyberservices@protonmail.com WhatsApp:+1(315)612-1269 Website:https://www.data-forensics.de/ Please share this information ,lets put a stop to scammers. God bless you as you do so.
Jason Turner
I still find it hard to believe, but it's true. I won $30 million in the Powerball, right here in Western Australia. What was once a distant dream is now my reality. The very first thing I’m doing is securing the dream home my family and I have always longed for. We used to imagine what life could be like if things ever turned around, and now, that vision is finally coming to life. This blessing has brought peace, freedom, and a new beginning for all of us. This life-changing moment wasn’t random. I reached out to Priest Isaac for spiritual guidance, and what followed was nothing short of extraordinary. His work realigned my energy, removed unseen blockages, and connected me to the path of abundance. Everything shifted from that point forward. This isn’t just about winning money, it’s about stepping into the life we were always meant to live. I’m deeply grateful for Priest Isaac’s spiritual support and wisdom. Without it, I truly don’t believe this transformation would have happened. If you feel like something’s been holding you back, I encourage you to take that first step. Priest Isaac is someone you can trust. For spiritual guidance, contact him directly: WhatsApp: [+17636203556] Email: [Prophet.Isaac@priest.com] Thank you, Priest Isaac. You’ve truly changed our lives.
Luna Brian
HOW I WAS CURED FROM HERPES VIRUS I am writing this testimonial with immense gratitude and a renewed sense of hope in my heart. For years, I battled with the physical and emotional torment caused by the herpes virus. It felt like an unending struggle, until I discovered a remarkable solution that changed my life forever. Like many others, I had tried countless remedies, medications in search of a cure. I had lost hope, resigned to the belief that herpes was something I would have to live with indefinitely. However, fate intervened and led me to a breakthrough that altered the course of my life. Upon stumbling on a revolutionary treatment option, my skepticism slowly transformed into a flicker of hope. The treatment was a natural remedy from Dr Awase [ HERBS ] Over time, as I followed the treatment diligently, I started noticing positive changes and I experienced a boost in my overall well-being. I am ecstatic to share that I am now herpes-free confirmed by my Dr after a test was done. The treatment I received was nothing short of miraculous and I couldn't be more grateful. I have regained my self-confidence and the burden that once weighed heavily upon me has been lifted. I was cured of my herpes virus through natural medication. If you, like me, have been struggling with herpes and searching for a way out, please know that hope exists. May my story inspire hope in the hearts of those who need it. He also specializes in getting rid of HPV, OVARIAN CYST, PCOS, HEPATITIS and a lot more. Contact on WhatsApp +2349074997110 Email:- dr.awaseherbalhome@gmail. com
Stacy Lynn Sager
Cassy
Yes I totally agree with this concept that there isn't a way that things can't be done in a more humane way, it is easier by my experience to encourage children to be more open regarding themselves this I find teaches them not only to have a heart for themselves but others. It is very important that a child is treated with up most respect and honor them as they are individuals. Not to push them or treat them poorly, my believe system is children can have knowledge that come from universal law as they are more connected than what people believe. Strangely enough I do treat them with respect and I have found that it is very useful. Now with this understanding it benefits n=me in my own life as I need to learn to have compassion for others. I will use this technique in my situation with me and my partner as I have found that there still seems to be some negative feelings that I caused.
The Greater Good Toolkit
Made in collaboration with Holstee, this tookit includes 30 science-based practices for a meaningful life.
The Greater Good Toolkit
Made in collaboration with Holstee, this tookit includes 30 science-based practices for a meaningful life.