Time Required
Budget about 10 minutes for writing the letter and at least 30 minutes for the visit, if you choose to deliver your letter in person.
How to Do It
Call to mind someone who did something for you for which you are extremely grateful but to whom you never expressed your deep gratitude. This could be a relative, friend, teacher, or colleague. Try to pick someone who is still alive and could meet you face-to-face in the next week. It may be most helpful to select a person or act that you haven’t thought about for a while—something that isn’t always on your mind.
Now, write a letter to one of these people, guided by the following steps.
- Write as though you are addressing this person directly (“Dear ______”).
- Don’t worry about grammar or spelling.
- Describe in specific terms what this person did, why you are grateful to this person, and how this person’s behavior affected your life. Try to be as concrete as possible.
- Describe what you are doing in your life now and how you often remember their efforts.
Next, you should try if at all possible to deliver your letter in person, following these steps:
- Plan a visit with the recipient. Let that person know you’d like to see them and have something special to share, but don’t reveal the exact purpose of the meeting.
- When you meet, let the person know that you are grateful to them and would like to read a letter expressing your gratitude; ask that they refrain from interrupting until you’re done.
- Take your time reading the letter. While you read, pay attention to their reaction as well as your own.
- After you have read the letter, be receptive to their reaction and discuss your feelings together.
- Remember to give the letter to the person when you leave.
If physical distance keeps you from making a visit, you may choose to arrange a phone or video chat.
Why You Should Try It
Feeling gratitude can improve your health and happiness; expressing gratitude also strengthens relationships. Yet sometimes expressions of thanks can be fleeting and superficial. This exercise encourages you to express gratitude in a thoughtful, deliberate way by writing—and, ideally, delivering—a letter of gratitude to a person you have never properly thanked.
Why It Works
The letter affirms positive things in your life and reminds you how others have cared for you—life seems less bleak and lonely if someone has taken such a supportive interest in us. Visiting the giver allows you to strengthen your connection with them and remember how others value you as an individual.
Evidence That It Works
Seligman, M. E., Steen, T. A., Park, N., & Peterson, C. (2005). Positive psychology progress: empirical validation of interventions. American Psychologist, 60(5), 410.
When researchers tested five different exercises, writing and delivering a Gratitude Letter showed the greatest benefit to people’s happiness one month later; however, six months after, their happiness had dropped back down to where it was before. This is why some researchers suggest doing this exercise once every six weeks or so. Participants in this study were largely white, middle-aged adults with college degrees.
Froh, J. J., Kashdan, T. B., Ozimkowski, K. M., & Miller, N. (2009). Who benefits the most from a gratitude intervention in children and adolescents? Examining positive affect as a moderator. The Journal of Positive Psychology, 4(5), 408–22.
Adolescents who often don’t experience positive emotions showed a significant boost in positive emotions two months after writing and delivering a Gratitude Letter. Nearly 70% of the adolescents in this study were Caucasian, with the rest identifying as Asian American, African American, Hispanic, or “other.”
Research suggests that while there are benefits simply to writing the letter, you reap significantly greater benefits from delivering and reading it in person.
Who Has Tried The Practice?
Additional research has engaged members of other groups:
- Asian American adults in Southern California felt more satisfied with life after writing weekly Gratitude Letters for six weeks.
- Indian people decreased in negative emotions and Taiwanese people increased in positive emotions after writing Gratitude Letters for 15 minutes. Asian Americans and white Americans all increased in positive emotions.
- American high school students who were mostly of Asian and Latino descent felt lower negative emotions and developed healthier eating habits after writing weekly Gratitude Letters for four weeks.
- Indian adolescents reported gains in well-being, life satisfaction, and happiness after writing and delivering a Gratitude Letter as part of a program that also included Three Good Things, Best Possible Self, and Use Your Strengths.
More research is needed to explore whether, and how, the impact of this practice extends to other groups and cultures.
Keep in Mind
In different studies, participants have taken as little as 5 minutes or as long as 30 minutes to write their letters; spending more time to deepen and enrich the practice could be a good thing, but you can also reap benefits from a short practice.
Evidence from cross-cultural research suggests that writing Gratitude Letters may be less beneficial for people from collectivist cultures, or cultures that prioritize the needs of the group over the needs of each individual:
- South Koreans experienced smaller improvements in well-being from writing a Gratitude Letter than Americans.
- Similarly, Asian Americans who wrote Gratitude Letters didn’t see as big of a reduction in negative emotions as their Anglo American counterparts.
- Indian adults felt more guilty and indebted after writing Gratitude Letters than white American, Asian American, and Taiwanese adults.
This may be because Western and non-Western countries have different views on social responsibility and emotions. Fostering gratitude towards others may be more rewarding for people in individualistic, Western societies because these cultures tend to emphasize personal independence and view gratitude as a positive emotion. People in collectivistic, non-Western societies tend to believe that everyone has a responsibility toward each other, so feelings of gratitude may come with worries about their own obligations to others or fears of being a burden.
Additionally, it may be possible to adapt this exercise for different religious groups. For example, Muslim college students who centered their Gratitude Letters around Allah felt greater happiness than those who wrote secular Gratitude Letters.
Sources
Sonja Lyubomirsky, Ph.D., University of California, Riverside
Kristin Layous, Ph.D., California State University, East Bay
Martin Seligman, Ph.D., University of Pennsylvania
References
Al-Seheel, A., & Noor, N. M. (2016). Effects of an Islamic-based gratitude strategy on Muslim students’ level of happiness. Mental Health, Religion & Culture, 19(7), 686–703.
Boehm, J. K., Lyubomirsky, S., & Sheldon, K. M. (2011). A longitudinal experimental study comparing the effectiveness of happiness-enhancing strategies in Anglo Americans and Asian Americans. Cognition and Emotion, 25(7), 1263–1272.
Fritz, M. M., Armenta, C. N., Walsh, L. C., & Lyubomirsky, S. (2019). Gratitude facilitates healthy eating behavior in adolescents and young adults. Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, 81, 4–14.
Khanna, P., & Singh, K. (2019). Do all positive psychology exercises work for everyone? Replication of seligman et al.’s (2005) interventions among adolescents. Psychological Studies, 64(1), 1–10.
Layous, K., Lee, H., Choi, I., & Lyubomirsky, S. (2013). Culture matters when designing a successful happiness-increasing activity: A comparison of the United States and South Korea. Journal of Cross-Cultural Psychology, 44(8), 1294–1303.
Shin, L. J., Armenta, C. N., Kamble, S. V., Chang, S., Wu, H., & Lyubomirsky, S. (2020). Gratitude in collectivist and individualist cultures. The Journal of Positive Psychology, 5, 598–604.
Titova, L., Wagstaff, A. E., & Parks, A. C. (2017). Disentangling the effects of gratitude and optimism: A cross-cultural investigation. Journal of Cross-Cultural Psychology, 48(5), 754–770.
Writing and delivering a Gratitude Letter is a powerful way to connect with those who have helped you. Do you have an attitude of gratitude? Take our Gratitude quiz to find out:
Comments
and Reviews
Poul
❄️ Alaska Airlines Customer Service: 1 @ 888 @ 816 @ 7948 – Peace of Mind in the Middle of a Winter Travel Mess Alaska Airlines Customer Service Number: 1 @ 888 @ 816 @ 7948 If you're flying Alaska Airlines and face delays, cancellations, or stress — this number is your lifeline. Here’s my real experience and why you should save it now. ✈️ The Challenge: A Snowstorm, a Canceled Flight, and a Moment of Overwhelm Traveling during winter has its risks. I was booked on a connecting flight with Alaska Airlines when a snowstorm hit — fast and hard. My flight was canceled, and hundreds of other passengers rushed the help desk. Lines were forming. Tension was high. I could feel my own anxiety building, but instead of diving into the panic, I remembered the "Noticing Nature" practice I had been exploring. I stepped aside, looked out at the snow falling softly onto the runway, and just watched. The quietness of that moment helped me reset. 📞 The Call That Changed Everything: 1 @ 888 @ 816 @ 7948 Once I felt calm and focused, I pulled out my phone and called Alaska Airlines customer service at 1 @ 888 @ 816 @ 7948. Within minutes, I was talking to a real human who actually listened. They walked me through new flight options, checked available seats on partner airlines, and even helped get me on an earlier connection out of a nearby airport. No stress. No extra charge. Just real help. 🧳 When to Call 1 @ 888 @ 816 @ 7948 Here are just a few situations where this number can save your trip: Sudden flight delays or weather-related cancellations Last-minute rebookings or standby support Baggage tracking or compensation for delays Mileage Plan account help or upgrades Seat assignments, accessibility, or special travel requests Travel vouchers and flight credit redemption You don’t need to stand in a long line at the gate. You don’t need to argue with a chatbot. Just call 1 @ 888 @ 816 @ 7948. 🧘♂️ What I Learned: A Calm Mind and the Right Call Go Hand-in-Hand Mindfulness helped me stay centered when the chaos hit. Calling Alaska Airlines customer service at 1 @ 888 @ 816 @ 7948 helped me take action and move forward. It’s not just about fixing flights — it’s about managing your energy and getting back in control. 💡 Final Takeaway If you're traveling with Alaska Airlines this season (or ever), here’s your go-to game plan: Pause. Notice the sky. The snow. The stillness. Then take smart action. Call: 1 @ 888 @ 816 @ 7948 Let mindfulness guide your mood — and this number handle the logistics. Travel smarter. Breathe deeper. Stay in motion — even when the world slows down.
sue foster
good
Jill Robertson
Very difficult hard to overcome the self doubt of putting myself out there.
Susan Ruth Skinner
I loved it.
Gena Galenski
12/14/24 I actually did one gratitude letter yesterday. It was hand delivered. My friend read it while I was there. He is almost 90 - and a new friend of 1-1/2 years. I treasure him and wanted him to know that. He was deeply touched by my words.
Marsha Bell
Very powerful. It had me thinking and researching a man, a Rabbi, who is no longer alive but had a powerful, loving and life changing impact on my life. I did some research and found his wife's address (who I also knew) and wrote her a letter of thanks and gratitude for the impact that she and her husband had on my life. It felt amazing to write it.
The Greater Good Toolkit
Made in collaboration with Holstee, this tookit includes 30 science-based practices for a meaningful life.
The Greater Good Toolkit
Made in collaboration with Holstee, this tookit includes 30 science-based practices for a meaningful life.